No cats were harmed in the making of this post. Singed maybe, but not harmed. We have an excellent cat whose primary characteristics are playing fetch exceptionally well, delighting in water, and being giant. He also has a remarkably large tail.
He is negligent with his tail. He waves it around, all fancy and proud, but when it’s time to twitch it out of the way of a foot or otherwise move it in a way that would save him from being squashed, he just lays there and suffers without making a peep. Then he attacks your leg with the fury of a thousand vikings hopped up on Norwegian Red Bull.
He is so careless that, as a mere youth, he flaunted it directly into a candle flame while illegally stamping around the table. He didn’t even run, lest he disrupt the formation of his girth, but instead hopped down and lazily trailed his torch through the house. Nice. We put him out and he looked at us with viking rage but we countered with DUDE. YOU WERE ON FIRE. He let it go. That time.
Rest assured, he is alive and well. And, as you can see, he was protected by any trauma by a tail the size of the Nile. Most importantly, his brief turn as a candle did not impact his ability to lead a long and disruptive life as a white, furry, landmine.