Don’t Tell Eleven People

We’ve been less selective about who to tell than I thought we would.  I think I imagined that we would keep this secret tucked away, hidden for months, only planning to tell when it became too late not to.  I have no idea what that mythical time might be, only that we’d probably know when it was.  I’m sure we’d feel relieved to have told, but also a little exposed, like someone was seeing us in our pajamas in the rain.  In reality, we’re like a leaking tire, by the time we get to “too late not to” everyone will know.

It doesn’t help that my mother, immediately after having heard the news, posted our pregnancy as a Facebook status update.  I’m not a technophobe, but that was just about enough for me to think of locking down my online presence all together.  Seriously mom, Facebook?  Fortunately, the long arm of social networking is still somewhat random and so the secret remains safe.

Then there’s the folks we felt we had to tell.  My sister (1) and our closest friends (2 – recently delivered of twins).  They saw us through the inseminations and provided both sanity and comfort.  They are understandably thrilled and would be our first support structure should anything happen to us.  But we told a few other folks too, since apparently we don’t know the value of peace and quiet.

My parents (2) – And thank goodness we did.  They’re here visiting now and it’s wonderful to see them fawn over D.  Advice: keep soda crackers by the bed.

My other sister (1) – I can’t leave out just one member of the immediate family.  I wish I could, but I’m not strong enough to withstand the pressure.  Advice: Buy The Girlfriend’s Guide to Getting Pregnant.

My grandmother (1, 94) – She is travelling with my parents and handled it as her clan does many things – with stoicism, patience and good will.  Advice:  None.  And none will be forthcoming, thank you very much.

My best friends since high school (2) – both parents, both huge fans of us as we are of them.  The only other two people who might notice if we fell apart on the heels of disaster. Advice: Don’t tell anyone the names you picked, play defense for her belly and be yourselves, you’ll be great parents.

Her guitarist (1) – The band is putting out an album and someone has to help divert the pressure to drink and smoke.  Advice: Take it easy.

A co-worker (1) – Due with her first in February, she used the same clinic we did and provided a great OB recommendation.  Advice: Which doctors are the best delivery docs in town.

Apparently my superstitious bent lies more toward actually possessing baby items and preparing for said arrival and less about TELLING THE WORLD.  So far we haven’t told anyone who we wouldn’t also share bad news with willingly (which seems to be our only rule of thumb).  But we haven’t told so important folks either, like her mother and sister.  I assume that will come when she’s ready or at Christmas under the “too late not to” rationalization.

We’ll be three months in sometime in November.  Maybe we can keep from telling another 11 people.  I’m not holding my breath.

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2 Responses

  1. Sharing such exciting news is hard NOT to do. I’m glad you have such wonderful support so far.

  2. It’s amazing how quickly the news gets out, isn’t it? It’s hard to keep an exciting secret, especially when you spend a lot of time thinking about it.

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