Don’t Bully Me

As a child, my mom had to do a fair amount of confidence building when I got bullied.  She had to work to break down some who-know-where-I-got-it-probably-from-her sense of needing to be liked (she managed it).  In first grade, a terrible child named Michelle Wells shoved me into a locker.  By the way, Michelle Wells’, if you all got here by googling your name, shame on all of you for not hunting your name-twin down and dropping her into a well. I’m sure my mother did all the appropriate school things (or probably she didn’t) and she told me that Michelle Wells was just jealous.  Remember that, since it’s her go-to phrase.

When I got a little older, a girl named Angela Delvecchio made fun of me in the pool for kicking faster than my teammates.  If I ever took a break, she’d ask the unspeakable question, “Did your battery run out?”  Well, it was the jeering tone, not the words.  My mother told me she was just jealous and she was probably right.  In sixth grade, an awful twin named Erica Smoot wanted to fight me on the playground.  I have no idea why.  Erica & Angela, are you here?  Explain yourselves! My mother gave me a tip or two on fighting (yes, she did) and told me…well, you’ve got it figured out by now.

Thankfully, I never internalized the jealousy thing (imagine how unbearable that would make me as an adult) but I did eventually learn to stand up for myself.  Probably that very day in sixth grade when I stared Erica Smoot down.  I eventually did all the lovely teenage things, sampled all the lovely teenage heights and slipped into the idyllic college world bully-free.  Well, there was one incident with an apple and a cute girl named Lara Andren but I think I deserved it.  Laras, spread the vindication among your kind. There have been other bullies, bosses mostly, but I’ve pretty much perfected standing up for myself.  Expecting a child has suddenly made that abundantly clear.

The OB clinic we visit is terrific.  The docs are nice, reception is friendly, we feel welcome and in good hands.  Dr. Georgardo is the standout asshole.  Our anti-gay radar has whistled and our dickhead siren has roared and I have used language not suitable for a lady.  Repeatedly.  Even so, the clinic tries to schedule us (and everyone else) to see him.  That should have tipped us off right then.  After some pleading with reception last visit, we finally learned how to avoid the “well, everyone else is just so booked” excuse.

I nicely asked one of the docs to give permission to schedule a few weeks out and then we approached reception armed with the chart.  It felt like a secret password.  Success!  Sort of…the very first appointment we tried to schedule, reception offered only Dr. Georgardo saying, “well, everyone else is just so booked”.  But we were on to them.  I softly explained that while we really thought all the doctors were more than capable, and we’d be happy to have any of them deliver Vegas, even Georgardo, we didn’t feel he was comfortable with us as a couple and we would really appreciate being scheduled with someone else.  And so she did.  And so I rocked. And there was no bullying.  Not from me.  Not from them.  And it was awesome.

Skipped to the end?  Don’t try to boss me.  I am nice.  That doctor is an asshat.  And we’re free from him for now.

2 Responses

  1. I think it’s funny how you remember the first and last name of all your bullies. It just goes to show what lasting effect mean people can have.

    That said – bravo to you for standing up for yourself and getting what you want!

    Now – more of the story about the apple and the cute girl please! 😉

  2. Good for you! Yay to not having to deal with Dr. Georgardo, at least for the moment!

    And I’ve got a similar list of bullies in my memory. Only mostly what I got was “they’re just doing it because they’re insecure”. Which I think is basically a variation on “they’re just jealous”. I think “well, some people are just assholes who get their jollies by picking on anyone they perceive as being less powerful than they are” is probably truer on the whole, but maybe less useful as advice. I dunno. What should we tell our kids? Shit, I need to start figuring this stuff out.

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