Milestone! Amusement Park!

RR only shrieked in terror once. Just once! Which is pretty damn good considering it was her first trip to an amusement park and she took on rides even her mother won’t touch. Most of the time she laughed and shouted and waved to D outside the fence shouting, “YOOK AT ME MAMA! I AM FYING!” You know how the Grinch’s heart grew three sizes at Christmas? Mine grew four just yesterday. It’s a wonder it still fits in my chest.

D and I had a long conversation last night about babies and RR in particular. It comes up every so often, her black, black newborn eyes, but I hadn’t known how off-putting it was to my wife. I didn’t assume I’d love RR outright (though I did and I’m happy for it). But, she did look like an alien with her solid black eyes and I admit it was a little easier to love her with her eyes closed. So I knew that I’d grow to love her more than I did at the start as we built on experiences and laughter together.

It has been a long time coming. I loved her more when she smiled at me for the first time. The first time she pronounced something I made for her “deeyicious.” The first time she splashed me in the bath. We’ve had our love delays though. She’s slow to warm (even to her mothers) and it wasn’t until this year that we doubled the love by willingly hugging, kissing, cuddling. She also prefers D. It has taken me three years to accept that she plays favorites and I usually come out on the low side of the 70/30 split. I still love her.

This morning, we approached almost 50/50 for the first time ever (though she did neglect to say goodbye to me while showering kisses on my wife) and I’m chalking that up to rides that spin. D gets seasick on those rides, you know, the ones that spin you around, shake you from side to side and whirl relentlessly. They don’t bother me, in fact, carousel excepted, they are my first choice when picking a line to stand in. I’d say it was luck, but it turned out to be a blessing: those are the rides RR is tall enough to ride.

She loved twirling around and scooted close as she could, “wrap your arm around me mama, hold me close!” I hugged her tight to me as we spun out into space over and over. I got to sniff her sunshine sweet hair as it blew against my cheek. I got to be fun in a way that just mine. It was wonderful.

The whole trip was better than I could have ever expected. D’s family was terrific (I know!), RR stowed the three-year-old dramatics for two days, rides (of course!), warm and dry weather, and a set of wonderful memories.

I’ve plenty else to say this week including a bit about Joel Osteen and my mother and not being pregnant. But for now, here are those black eyes I was talking about. Admit it. Sometimes a blink is a welcome relief.

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4 Responses

  1. The spider is a nice touch to go with those dark eyes! Our boyo had very dark eyes at birth as well–and an INTENSE gaze!! And, thank you for the thoughts on being NGP–I am the NGP this go around and it’s been different (often in good ways…) than my experience as the GP.

    • It’s different but, for me, a very positive experience. Except for the whole being shunned thing – that happens far too much for my liking 🙂 Also, welcome back to the written world and congratulations on the birth!

  2. Even though others have told
    Me newborns are creepy and my friend says they look like little aliens, all I can see is the cuteness, preciousness of these little beings. It is also amazing to see how much RR has grown, and yet also how much she looks like herself even as a newborn, if that makes sense.

    • She does look like herself. Just when I think she’s such a kid I’ll see that same face and same expressions shine through. I’m biased but…adorable!

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