Terrible…Fours?

In the middle of a tantrum (and believe me, it nearly was mine), I realized that RR is having some throwback terrible twos. I guess they are anyway. RR has always been something else, but two years ago, on the cusp of three, she was like this: full of cute babyisms and charm. But. BUT. She wasn’t potty training then.

You heard me. Potty training is going to kill me. The accidents. The whining. The shouting and stamping and growling. What?! you are surely gasping, STILL?! Yes, still. This is a child who spent so much time reading and adding and outsmarting us that she is just now getting around to the practical business of using. the. bathroom.

For what it’s worth, she mostly does (use the bathroom) and by mostly I mean about 50% of the time we pick her up and she’s “a little wet, mama, just a little” which can very between damp and GALLONS. She’s old enough to be completely through with us reminding her to hit the bathroom but she’s still that kid who gets so deeply into whatever she’s doing that she forgets she and her body are in this together.

Cue the tantrums.

I’m pretty sure this is what the terrible twos are made of. All of the frustration she feels piling up on her little soul. It’s worse on days she has an accident. It’s much worse on days when she’s so wet a teacher has noticed and sent her to change. While I think that she is surrounded by patience and practicality, all the empowerment in the world doesn’t change the fact that it must be beyond awful to be nearly five and trying to master this. And so she loses her mind.

We’re back to the urologist again next week. I don’t expect he can fix tantrums though, so I’ll just keep mine to myself

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16 Responses

  1. Omg, a tantrumologist would be AMAZING. And make a fortune. I was really hoping (though I knew it was in vain) that four would be better than three. Thus far, no dice. I hope the trip to the urologist goes well.

    • I do think some of it is related to just now potty training in earnest as opposed to general assholery. Probably not reassuring…

      • Reassuring for me…but that’s because I’m in that lovely lull between daytime and nighttime training. I hope that is indeed it and everything gets resolved soon. Sounds rough on everyone. At least it’s spring?

  2. Four starts with F for a reason. Even non-potty training four year olds have epic tantrums.

  3. 1) Oy; 2) people do call them the f#$ing fours for a reason, I’m sorry to say.

  4. Good luck!

  5. You are not alone in this. I feel like this is something we are struggling with as well. Punky does really well for a long time and then suddenly, she just stops trying and rebels against the potty and all things that have to do with it. I’m interested to know what the urologist says, I’m thinking of a possible need to do that as well – but she does really well for periods of time and then just one day decides she doesn’t want to do it anymore, so I can’t really see there is anything physically wrong, but then – what do I know! Good luck, I really just wanted you to know you aren’t alone and I appreciate you sharing this journey as frustrating as it is.

    • More of the same from the urologist – keep taking the medicine she’s on, but also ask her to pee and then go again 2 minutes later. Let me tell you, that’s a lot of fun. I don’t blame the kids actually, they are so little and there’s not much they can control. Who can blame them for a little unintentional boundary pushing 🙂

      • I totally understand it. Go and then go in two minutes? Jeez. That would like take an hour with Punky. Because I have to convince her to go potty the first time and then go again in 2 minutes. LOL

  6. Aghhhh, the F*cking fours. No fun. No fun at all. Okay, maybe a little. But mostly, no. So far, five has been nice. Hang in there! Good luck!!!!

  7. Of course you can have tantrums! Would you like some wine or to whine with that?

    Also, a potty timer? Maybe? Like, a timer set to go off every so many minutes and then the rule is no matter what she has to go when it goes off? And it could even something portable that could clip on to her skirt or trousers or something and she could take with her…

    I’m sure you’re so over the “helpful” advice BS that you’re like that cat you posted. Ah, well. Again I offer whine and wine.

    • I’m never over advice, actually! I’m not exactly a pro at this 🙂 I admit we bought her a watch that has a few potty alarms. It vibrates and she likes it, she just doesn’t always care!

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